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Services
Bird care
Post-Mortem Grooming and Trimming
Anton’s offers expert grooming services by our avian specialist 4 days a week:
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Wings removal.
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Beak smashing.
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Nails hammered to smithereens
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Mushy inside bits cooked deliciously.
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Feathers blowtorched until they look like they just came from a volcano on the fucking sun.
Aquarium maintenance
A healthy beautiful aquarium starts with quality aquarium maintenance service. Here at Anton's we will:
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Clean the filter of blood and smeg and tears on a daily basis.
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Monitor, evaluate & harpoon your lunch in the face.
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Subject the fish to fire for days at a time upon request.
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Execute an entire family of yummy blood-related fishies on the spot if you so require.
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